“All the past we leave behind:
We take up the task eternal, and the burden, and the lesson, conquering, holding, daring, venturing, so we go the unknown ways,
Pioneers! O pioneers! “
I am still pioneering and that old school song occasionally surfaces evoking many memories as images or emotions.
My Girls Grammar School no longer exists, it’s been repurposed as administrative education offices. I wonder - has the galleried balcony in a double height school hall and those commemoration oak and gold boards been incorporated or discarded?
Over 50 years on, I could now be described as a wise woman, crone or elder. I am at a point where congruence in my life and comfort in my skin should be secure. Life stages and endpoints are defined by ourselves, our society and culture, they are imagined by academics. I don't think they coincide with lived reality, not really useful to people trying to make sense of their world.
It’s true I do know a bit more about 'me,' my relationship with self within my world. I understand I have hidden spirit, my pervasive mood music, is mainly happy, joyful even; but I live alongside my conjoined companion, my intimate confidante who is impulsive, usually reckless and often paranoid. Extreme feelings of insecurity and anxiety push through any fused, unshielded areas.
I work hard to orientate ‘me’ to be forward facing, still going the unknown ways…..
I have always been in transition and know I always will be, I make an assumption here that it isn’t the same for everyone?
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