Happy Birthday Adam William
Each wake-up is sudden, a surprise, a curiosity. Thinking is instant and now mostly pleasant. Matters of 'me' ‘who am I?’ immediate. Each wake –up day is defined at its start. What follows is a mix of that first definition blended, extempore, to encompass risk, excitement, choice, responsibility: would that be living a life then?
Yes, I can become a Livologist!
Remember that word - Livologist I will return to that tomorrow
My first task though - is not meant to be melancholic or morose. It uplifts me as I remember that I have lived through various personal calamities, disasters, catastrophies - whatever.
So you will either have to:-
ditch my blog altogether,
pick up again tomorrow or
join me in my "I am not dead yet" world
Lamentations
One thing after another….really?
Just realised body is beautiful but nothing without a mind,
Mind is nothing without a body, nothing to feel the world through
Both is a good idea
Who thought of that?
God?
Mind is nothing without a body, nothing to feel the world through
Both is a good idea
Who thought of that?
God?
For Bill
3.00 am Tuesday 13th January 2015
Drinking you in, so thirsty
Your beautiful hands
Your beautiful feet
Rain outside splattering
Shattering peace
Drinking you in
Remembering
11.00 pm Thursday 15thJanuary 2015
Dissociation
When did this strategy happen?
When was not belonging to the world
A way of coping, not feeling
Safe, protected in isolation,
Separate, kept apart
The flip side?
Love, loving, feeling my heart
You cut the thread to length and joined the parts
7.00pm Friday 16thJanuary 2015
We had time, we should have had time
I know words are never enough; never precise exact
But there was always supposed to be another day
We had time, we should have had time to act
8.00pm Friday 16thJanuary 2015
You were always there my love, my benign presence,
Strong, stealthy, behind me
Who will I become next year?
It was easy when I was cradled by you,
Now I have to grow up.
10.00pm Friday 16thJanuary 2015
Such exquisite, piercing pain is grief
And yet relief
As magical memories flood through
To fill the absence left by you
11.15 pm Friday January 16th 2015 you died
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